"People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Love them anyway.  If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway. If you are successful you will win some false friends and true enemies; Succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway. "

--Mother Teresa

You know what's funny? Knowing there is someone like you in the world. Firsthand. Knowing that there's someone who preaches their faith and love for others in such a seemingly honest but incredibly hypocritical way. I guess all the love you have to give to others, the gifts of friendship that you "bless" the world with, the beauty that you see in people, blahblahblah...

I guess I'm the exception to all that goodness and love you have toward others? Or do you just forget about our friendship? I guess it's okay to hurt people if you don't really have to see the repercussions... then it doesn't really count right? Then you can go along being this great friend to everyone else and forget about the people you failed to be a real friend to. It's okay, you have other successful friendships, so I guess mine didn't matter all that much the grand scheme of things. That's fine. I wonder if all your new friends know how fast you drop the, what was it? inconvenient ones?

It's 2009 now, and I'm hoping that with this new year I can gather together a sense of forgiveness for you, even though you sure as hell aren't asking for it, nor do you really deserve it. I'm hoping that in 2009 I can stop being so bitter towards the way you treated me as one of your "best friends" and let it go. I'm really hoping I can do this with a sincere and open heart, because in 2008 I really just wanted to hate you. And being the only person I've ever felt that way toward, I'm thinking maybe I should give you some kind of congratulatory award. A plaque maybe? Or maybe I should be like you, and not care that we aren't friends anymore. But, being that I spent years caring about our friendship, and more importantly caring about you as a person, that's pretty hard to do. And you know what? It really sucks that this is the way it is and that it still upsets me, and it's really shitty. I don't know how you just stopped caring about me, and about our friendship... I don't know how you do it, it's impressive.

I hope that I can let it go, I truly do, because it's never good to hold hate in your heart for another person. But I don't know how, really -- I mean, on the scale of things you were worse than he ever was, easy.

And I've never been quite as good of a Catholic as you are, anyway... 

cheers to new year... and hoping for the best, eh?